There's something about excuses that are kind of like babies on an airplane; nobody wants to hear them. But would you be willing to read them?
I haven't posted in a while because...
I started working here.
And after three weeks of employment, I STILL haven't been fired. As a matter of fact, a handful of my coworkers decided to mimic my standing desk lifestyle. Granted, it started as mockery, but the joke has since run its course and at least ten of my colleagues continue to meerkat out of their cubicles. Now, I just have to prove my writing abilities.
this circus came to town.
And even thought I didn't partake in most of the musical performances, movie premiers and interactive circle jerks, I was perpetually distracted by what was going on in my backyard. For two weeks straight, I was like a dog whimpering at squirrels on the windowsill. Luckily, I did spend one day cheering for fun. before sunrise, growing a mustache, dodging balls, stalking Kimbra (aka, that girl from "Somebody That I Used To Know"), envying Graffiti6 (b#*%es love British accents), getting over it with Fanfarlo, Going Godzilla on a vending machine, throwing up in my mouth and getting bombed at dinner. (Get it?) It was worth every word I didn't type.
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my rambles landed me a paying gig.
Which makes writing for free seem kind of silly. I'm not saying I'll never Yelp or blog again (obviously), but my free time has a price. Besides, I get to write about things like Austin's most potent cocktails and a sushi making class. Oh, and did I mention they pay me to do this? No Yelp Elite party or blog advertising can compete with a reliable second income.
deal sites are too damn addicting.
Between Goupon, Living Social, Google Offers, Yelp Deals and Scoutmob, my lovely accomplice and I have potential dates lined up from now until the end of time. So far, we've been pushed down a hill in an inflatable hamster ball, backflipped from a flying trapeze bar, survived a sketchy carnival (aren't they all) and tried more restaurants than you can fit in Myrtle Beach's city limits. Not to mention the trampoline, ATV and rock climbing vouchers we've yet to use. It's hard to find free time when so many activities are practically free.
I wised up and got a pseudo iPhone.
Why did it take me so long, you ask? Fear, my friends. Fear of what would happen if I finally got my hands on one of these mobile procrastination devices. It was bad enough when I Yelped, blogged, pinned, Tweeted and Facebook stalked from my laptop, but all productivity came to halt once I discovered Words With Friends and Draw Something. The other day I came home from work around 6:30 PM, sat on the couch and caught up on each game. When I finally hit the "home" button on my phone, the clock read 10:10 PM! I haven't spent that much time in front of a screen since my bout with unemployment (which I will soon face again if I don't trash those apps).
You might not like it, but that's why I've been neglecting the few fans I have left. If you can find it in your heart to forgive me (again), I promise to be more like this baby.
