Monday, January 30, 2012

THE 84TH ACADEMY AWARDS.

Don't cry, Golden Guy. There's always next year.
There's something about The 84th Academy Awards that excites me about as much as a family reunion. I mean sure, I'll participate for the sake of tradition, but I'm not exactly excited about it. To see where the 2012 Oscars went wrong, Let's compare it with its predecessor.

THE HOSTS
Anne Hathaway & James Franco vs. Billy Crystal

Yes, Billy Crystal could do a better job than Hathaway and Franko if he were in a coma, but I can't stop looking at him as Eddie Murphy's understudy. He's like the girl you settle for because the one you truly wanted kicked you to the curb and you can't stand the thought of being alone. Again, Crystal will most definitely be funnier than the heartthrobs of 2011, but is the host really THAT important? Call me crazy, but I feel the nominees are what make or break an award show. Which brings me to my next topic...

THE BEST PICTURE
The King's Speech vs. A Silent Film

In my opinion, 2011 was one of the best years for cinema since the day I was born. The average Rotten Tomato score for the 2011 Best Picture Nominees was 93%, with Inception bringing down the mean with a "disappointing" 86%. What's this year's average? 83%, with Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close earning a Best Picture nod after becoming "certified rotten" at 45%. Marky Mark beat that with Contraband (48%)! If it's not Midnight in Paris or Moneyball, I don't care who takes home this year's top honor. Especially with the heartbreaking absence of my favorite production studio...

THE END OF PIXAR'S REIGN
Toy Story 3 vs. ZERO Nominees

I knew there was no way in Hollywood Cars 2 was going to keep Pixar's Best Animated Feature streak alive, but it wasn't even NOMINATED! Last year's Toy Story 3 won Best Animated Feature AND earned a Best Picture nomination. The same goes for Up the year before. Pop Quiz: What was the last Pixar movie that failed to win the Best Animated Feature Oscar? Cars 1 (2006). I've said it once and I'll say it again, this is what happens when you put merchandising before screenwriting.


MY PRICK-ISH PREDICTIONS 

I have plenty of other beefs with the Academy for this year's lackluster ceremonies (No nomination for David Fincher, Too many nominations for The Artist, etc.), but I'll wrap up this post with my Oscar picks. Do with them as you wish.

Best Picture
Who I hope will winMidnight in Paris
Hilarious. Entertaining. Well-acted. Well-written. What more do you want from a best picture? Any aspiring writer would kill for Gil's experience. 

Who will winThe Artist
The film industry has been gooing over this overrated film all award season. Just give it the highest honors and get off your high horse, Hollywood.  

Actor in a Leading Role
Who I hope will winBrad Pitt
He and Jonah Hill made this 133 minute move captivating from beginning to end credits. It's about time Pitt wins something other than People's Sexiest Man Alive. 

Who will winJean Dujardin 
Clooney has won enough and silent acting seems to receive as much praise as playing a mentally handicapped character.

Actress in a Leading Role
Who I hope will winMichelle Williams
Although I have yet to see My Week With Marilyn, and feel Ms. Monroe gave birth to the age of the more-ta-tas-than-talent actress, I LOVE Michelle Williams.

Who will winGlenn Close
Her time has come.

Actor in a Supporting Role
Who I hope will winJonah Hill
Hill killed it.

Who will winJonah Hill 
I'm going to be balsy and stick to my guns on this one.

Actress in a Supporting Role
Who I hope will winMelissa McCarthy
I went into this movie wanting to dislike her due to my disdain for overtly-crude females. I found myself anxiously anticipating her every scene. 

Who will win: Bérénice Bejo
For the same reason The Artist will win just about everything. However, I won't deny that she was extremely easy on the eyes. 

Animated Feature Film
Who I hope will winI don't even care. 
This category is dead to me this year.

Who will winA Cat In Paris
I like cats and I feel like the Academy is going to go with a throwback this year. Sorry, CGI.  

Cinematography
Who I hope will winThe Tree Of Life
Say what you will about the story, this movie looked gorgeous. 

Who will winThe Tree Of Life
Ditto. 

Art Direction
Who I hope will winHarry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Pt. 2
This movie deserves SOMETHING!

Who will winHarry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Pt. 2
Bringing the wizarding world to real life is no easy task.

Costume Design
Who I hope will & will winHugo
It was the most imaginative.

Directing
Who I hope will winWoody Allen
He brought 1920s Paris to life in that quirky way only he could accomplish.

Who will winTerrance Malick
The Academy appreciates the avant-garde.

Documentary Feature
Purely A Guess: Hell And Back Again
I haven't seen any of the Documentary Feature Nominees, but this one deals with soldiers. Soldiers are hot right now.

Documentary Short
Purely A GuessThe Tsunami And The Cherry Blossom
Natural disasters are always a strong contender.

Film Editing
Who will win: The Artist
Just cause.

Foreign Language Film
Who will winBullhead
Because it's being distributed by The Alamo Drafthouse.

Makeup
Who will winHarry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Pt. 2
Because making Glenn Close look like a man isn't THAT hard of a task.

Music (Original Score)
Who will winThe Artist
Because the music had to carry the film.

Music (Original Song)
Who will winMan or Muppet
Because there's only one other competitor.

Short Film (Animated)
Purely A GuessThe Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore
Because it looked REALLY hard to make.

Short Film (Live Action)
Purely A GuessThe Shore
Because I grew up by a beach.

Sound Editing
Who will winDrive
Because that shotgun bang still haunts my dreams.

Sound Mixing
Who will winThe Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
Because it deserves something!

Visual Effects
Who will winHarry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Pt. 2
Because it should have been nominated for more.

Writing (Adapted Screenplay)
Who I hope will win: Moneyball
How badass would it be if Aaron Sorkin won two in a row?

Who will winThe Descendants
Because I've snubbed it thus far. And it was pretty clever.

Writing (Original Screenplay)
Who I hope will winMidnight In Paris
It perpetuated my pie-in-the-sky dreams of becoming a novelist.

Who will winMidnight In Paris
Because, "No subject is terrible if the story is true and the prose is clean and honest."



(Note: These votes are subject to change. There are a few movies I still need to see before the ceremonies. However, my views on the hosts, Best Picture nominees and lack of Pixar, will NOT.)





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